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Or are you fooling around with that squaw you work for. She’s a little red, but I bet she’s got a prime cunt.”I was getting pretty pissed and Kyle was ahead of me. Without realizing it, I’d loosened the safety strap on my right gun where Despain couldn’t see my hand.“Stand straight and turn toward me, boy!” the Sheriff snapped. I did as ordered. I wanted to be in this position anyway. I now had my hand and my gun where I needed them. “Drop them gun belts!” I wore a gun on each hip, but each had its own belt. As a result, I could loosen my left gun and still have the right ready to draw. I kept watch on Despain as I felt the buckle loosen. I saw his eyes flick to the side as I tossed the belt to my left. My right flashed to my side and I fired before my mind had caught up with the action. I felt the sting in my gut. The Sheriff was falling backward, a hole in his chest as I was falling forward with my guts spilling out.“I’m sorry, Kyle,” I whispered. “It wasn’t supposed to be like. Everybody has some story about almost getting caught. My friend Stacy almost lost her black plastic sheet at a rainy football game, a much funnier story.Then there’s Samuel’s physical fitness story. We were home for Christmas and he found my Mr. Howdy and put him on the far side of his bed, hostage. When I snuck in for a rescue, it was a trap, pretty fun for a cold winter’s night.At breakfast Dad asked what was the banging about. Samuel said he did pushups every day, but had forgotten until he was in bed. You can’t do real pushups on a mattress, the exercise kind, anyway. My kind, I could.BIRTHDAY PARTIESThe big event of the Bicentennial was my turning 30. I’d always thought that was so old, but now I had to change the threshold. We had a Howdy party, everyone a character. Samuel was Howdy. He said I had to be Heidi, but I said it was my party and I got to be the Princess -- I’d be Heidi afterwards -- and wore an Indian costume that revealed when I served the grape punch. Indian.
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