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The urge to look was starting to bug me. Whatever she could have been yakking about to my boss was baffling me too. After a bit of aimless fumbling around in accounts, bossy-poo showed up, glowering. “Get the fuck over there and fuck her before my balls explode like in 'Scanners'.” “Wasn't that heads that exploded in Scanners?” “Get the flying f-” “Whoh whoh whoh whoh wait a minute. Just hold the fuck on. Um, what the fuck is going on here?” After explaining that he bumped into her while she was walking her pug yesterday and agreed to do her on the roof today for $3,500 (but then she angrily reneged after seeing me come too soon), my boss leaned forward, with both hands on my desk, and said, “So, you premature-ejaculating mother-fucker, she ain't finishing me off until she has you, like, now, you catch my stinking fucking drift?” “Ummm.” “Yeah. You. I'd probably like to get my $3,500-worth, ya think? Her code is-” Cutting him off again and holding my ring up to him, I said, “Hey,. There’s a Tech Wiz in Bend and I notice they have sales flyers in the paper almost weekly.”“Three hundred dollars is pretty cheap. What else would I need?” he wondered.“A printer. I have a one color laser printer by this same company and it was less than a hundred dollars.”“What about programs?” he continued.“Well, I have an old Microsoft Office 2000 that I’ve been using for years. It’s obsolete now but it still does everything I want it to do. However there are two or three similar concepts to Office that are free on line. Apache Office and Libre Office have almost every feature that MS Office has. You can set up inventory lists, do invoicing, billing, you can even download tax forms from the State or Federal Government. I’ll bet Jana can find her way around that program with ease,” I grinned.“Dad, that sounds exactly what you need,” Jana piped up. “That antique you’ve got is really not very helpful to you. I’m going to take some classes on business management and I bet I’ll learn.
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