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He loved his wife, but questioned if he was still in love with her. As a fellow drunk said to him one night while he was traveling for work ‘if you have to ask the question, then you’ve answered it.’ It was amazing the kind of things you could discuss with total strangers. Especially those who, by their eyes you could tell had been on the road too long. He had gone as far as to ask her outright if she’d consider having an affair with him. She admitted that there was an obvious attraction between them. And that they’d ‘be good together.’ But then she asked the question that drove it all home. ‘Where will you be on Christmas morning?’ she asked. And she was right. She deserved more. She deserved someone who would be there all the time. Not part time. So that’s how it was, Dearest of friends but just friends. He traveled for work quite a bit. Usually leaving Monday morning and returning Friday evening. Far too many dinners alone staring at his reflection in the mirror behind the hotel. She protects me, I need her. She has always been there for me."Myriam looked away. "Only when it was too late," she went on in a whisper, "did I discover what she had become — she is like a sick rubber wall around me. No — a cage made of sticky gum. It opens less and less. It gets so tiring to struggle free — even for minutes. Even right now, I don't know how long I'll be able to fend her off."I stared into the face of the woman who had been my life for almost ten years. The woman I had thought I knew better than myself. And here I was — once more realizing I had never known her at all. I peered into an ever-shifting, surreal haze."Myr," I said — which was a huge improvement on my former one-syllabled "I." "What on earth are you talking about? Estelle, you say? Estelle is your hooker name, Myriam. All the escorts use one. It is just a professional alias. You can't blame a name!"A hidden spark suddenly surfaced in her eyes. Subtle shifts molded her facial expressions — a horribly.
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