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What's up?" he asked as he opened the door. It looked like he had just woke up, his short black hair was uncombed and his eyes were partially closed. He was wearing just a pair of black silk boxers. It's been a long time since I had seen him in no shirt and he looked good, damn good. I felt something stir inside me."Uh -- um -- you left your cell at my place last night," I stammered, handing his phone to him."Oh. Thanks. I'm always leaving this thing somewhere," he said. "You wanna come in?" No. I just came by to return your phone," I said, not making eye contact with him."Have you had breakfast yet?" he asked."No," I said quietly. "Look Jason, I'm sorry about being such a bitch to you last night. I know you were just being a concerned friend and I treated you like shit." It's okay, Mel, really. I paid no attention to it. I'm just glad I could make sure you got home safely," he said, smiling as I looked up at him. His blue eyes sparkled when he smiled at me. "Why don't you just come. I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of only once every 10 days. The following is a list of why I didn’t succeed more often:We will wake the kids - 54 timesIt’s too late - 15 timesI’m too tired - 42 timesIt’s too early - 12 timesIt’s too hot - 18 timesPretending to be asleep - 31 timesThe neighbors will hear - 9 timesHeadache or backache - 26 timesSunburn - 10 timesYour mother will hear us - 9 timesNot in the mood - 21 timesWatching the late show - 17 timesToo sore - 26 timesNew hairdo - 6 timesWrong time of the month - 14 timesYou had to go to the bathroom - 19 timesOf the 36 times that I DID succeed, the result was not always satisfying because 6 times you just laid there, 8 times you reminded me that there was a crack in the ceiling, 4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with, 7 times I had to wake you up to tell you I was finished, and once I was afraid that I had hurt you because you started thrashing around and breathing heavy. Let’s try to improve this,.
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