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Ihad never experienced before the feeling I felt then. To my knowledge,when I was male, no girl ever looked at me the way these two boyslooked at me. I now knew how a deer must feel when a wolf sights herand begins to stalk her. I had known both of those guys since we werein kindergarten, and I never dreamed they could stare at anyone the waythey were staring at me."It won't be so bad," Cindy consoled me as we drove to her house. "Ifyou just relax and let things happen, you'll find it's fun to be agirl." For you, maybe," I sniffed. "You've always been a girl. You wouldn'tknow what it's like to be a guy one minute and a girl the next." True," she conceded as well turned into her driveway, "but you'll haveto make the best of it."Cindy's room was bright and very feminine."Your room probably looks a lot like this," she said. "Everythingaround you will change to fit the person you have become."I tried to imagine what my room must look like without all the modelplanes I built when I was. I knew that it would be hard for me to find another job, especially one that paid that well.I must have sounded scared and vulnerable when I replied, “Please, Ben, is there anything I can do to avoid being cut? I need this job and don’t know how I'll be able to find another one.”Ben replied, “Believe me, Ed, I know. You've been a good worker and have done everything I’ve asked of you, so far. I hate to be put into this position, but I have needs too. I’ve had to cut back on some of my costly personal services for things that I really enjoy. I just don’t think that I have much choice at this point.”The reality that I might be fired was sinking in and I was frantic. I thought for a moment and asked, "Is there anything that I could do for you to help make it up? What kinds of services are you talking about anyway?”Ben studied my face for a moment and said, “Well, I injured my back about ten years ago, and have been getting professional massages three times per week. They cost me a.
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