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What had I done to deserve a man who loves me so much? Who cradles me like an infant when I breakdown, who teaches and shows me the world through eyes so much brighter than my own? You restored my faith in men, the upstanding goodness in humanity, the vulnerable beauty of the smallest of things. In the morning you will mutter in a newborn manner, and reach for me across the sea of sheets with two long, ape like arms, longing to be held, and I will hold you as you hold me. I love the smallness of your hands, the neatness of each fingernail, the crease of your beautiful eyes as you wince at waking. You call me dear, or beautiful, as if it was as much my name as my birth certificate. Every time you do I feel my soul curl like a leaf in the blessing of light, and I reach for you, full point, to kiss the lips that spoke to me. You are a secretive man with no secrets. I know everything and nothing and sometimes I wonder why. I have seen you fall to the ground, broken, and weep in my arms. Lucy was probably the most intelligent girl in my sister’s class that was only one year behind mine. She had a mind like a sponge that soaked up all the teacher’s words and everything she read in a book was filed away inside her well-organized vault of a mind. I wondered if she had all of my words and my silly promises stored up there as well. If so, I was in trouble because sometimes I was so desperate to bury my cock in pussy that I promised her the Sun, the Moon, and the Stars if she would only let me get inside her silly “Pooh Bear” panties. When I saw the smiling bear down around her ankles, I knew it was time to come knocking on Lucy’s door. One time, when we were all under the blanket at the campfire on the beach, I did Lucy in her rear door with lots of muffled groans and little whimpers of “go slow”. My sister was right on the other side watching us and she smiled that little knowing smile that told me in no uncertain terms that she was fully aware just how deep I was up poor.
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