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J. Holub, Kansas City Chiefs linebacker regarding his twelve knee operations: “My knees look like they lost a knife fight with a midget.”Vic Braden, tennis instructor: “My theory is that if you buy an ice cream cone and make it hit your mouth, you can learn to play tennis. If you stick it on your forehead, your chances aren’t as good.”Walt Garrison, Dallas Cowboys fullback when asked if Tom Landry ever smiles: “I don’t know. I only played there for nine years.”John Breen, Houston Oilers: “We were tipping off our plays. Whenever we broke from the huddle, three backs were laughing and one was pale as a ghost.”Bum Phillips, New Orleans Saints, after viewing a lopsided loss to the Atlanta Falcons: “The film looks suspiciously like the game itself.”Al Hrabosky, major league relief pitcher: “When I’m on the road, my greatest ambition is to get a standing boo.”Paul Horning, Green Bay Packers running back on why his marriage ceremony was before noon: “Because if it didn’t work out, I didn’t. The end was in sight, and the three of us were quite happy about it. She had a four-week outpatient rotation in Indianapolis in May, and then she would graduate and would be ‘Doctor Adams’ for real.I went back into the house, filled my travel mug with coffee, and walked to the office. It was early, but I liked being in the office alone, when it was completely quiet. Today I’d get about three hours of pure, uninterrupted work done before everyone showed up and we had our staff meeting.Just after 8:00am Kaitlin came to the door of my office.“Steve, there’s a call for you from someone named Ivan Voronin,” she said. “Line 1.”I pressed the button on the phone and lifted the handset.“Vanya? It’s Stepa. Good morning!”He laughed, “Good evening! It’s much later in Moscow! How are you?”“Very good! What can I do for you?”“Do you remember the company I helped start in Wisconsin? Belarus Tractors?”“I do,” I said.“They have need of some assistance with their computer systems. They have a.
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