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And he spelled his name the same way you do. His name was Ronald Crawford Biles. Have you ever heard of him?"The room got suddenly very hot, and the world seemed to tilt a little, this was more than just a little weird. I found it difficult to speak and finally I croaked out, "Yes sir; that was my father who died in World War II. My name is Richard Biles."He extended his hand, and as we shook, he explained, "Actually your dad and I were best friends, and we were roommates on the USS Bates. Would you like to hear the story about how he died?"And the hits kept coming; was this guy kidding? Mom and I had spent the past 20 years trying to convince the Navy to give us some information about dad's death. All we kept getting was that it was top secret. I've never even heard the name USS Bates before. The government wouldn't even tell us if they had ever recovered a body, and if it had, where it went. They wouldn't tell us how he died, or where he died. All we ever received was the. A Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife."You come to the front door of the apartment building. I am in apartment 3-1There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 3-1. I will buzz you in. Come inside and the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3rd Floor. When you get out,I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell. OK?" Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?"What, You're coming empty handed?"An old Italian man in Brooklyn is dying. He calls his grandson to his bedside, "Guido, I wan' you lissina me. I wan' you to take-a my chrome plated... 38 revolver so you will always remember me." But grandpa, I really don't like guns ... How about you leave me your Rolex watch instead?" You lissina me, boy! Somma day you gonna be runna da business, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos." Somma.
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