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There was a lot of fumbling and groping that went on after that and ... well ... we never did get back to the issue of capitalization.I walked into Carmine’s Cucina on Thursday at noon and a very reserved Wendy met me at the door.“Usual, Mr. Ames?” she asked.“Uh ... Wendy?”She pointed at Clarice’s booth and I saw there was another person in the booth with her. I nodded at Wendy.“Okay.”She smiled and I went over to join Clarice.“Is this a good time, Clarice?” I asked. “I can come back later.”“Tony. We were waiting for you. Here, sit with me.”She slid over on the bench to make room and I sat face-to-face with a middle-aged woman. She had coal black hair with a streak of white through it that reminded me of that late-night horror movie lady on television. She was wearing way too much makeup for any normal person and her eyebrows had been plucked or waxed and then drawn back on with a pencil. She was dressed simply, but her blouse was unbuttoned one button too far—make that two. Sprawl on the couch as if you're sleeping or passed out, with the robe "accidentally" untied, and your body completely revealed. Obviously you've had too much to drink, you've passed out, and the exposure is completely accidental.Listen carefully when your son returns home; ignore any "Hey Mom, I'm home" calls. Hopefully he'll discover your "sleeping" body on his own. You should be able to tell if he's just standing or sitting there staring at you (as he probably will: what teenage male would miss a chance like this to get an eyeful of a naked woman, right?).When you figure he's had enough looking, stir, wake up, be confused. Completely ignore the open robe and your nudity. drunkenly, cheerfully (you're a silly, happy drunk in this role) peer at your son, say hello, apologize for getting so wasted. Try to get up, stumble, and ask for his help to get you to bed. Encourage him to help hold you up. On the way to the bedroom, push against him, give him a hug (pressing your naked body.
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