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.. Do you know why Santa Claus doesn't have any children of his own?He only comes once a year and then that's down the chimney.This one is compliments of DennisThe Man RulesAt last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. We always hear the rules From the Woman side. Now here are the rules from the man side.These are our rules!Men are NOT mind readers.Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down ... We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.Crying is blackmail.Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.Anything we said 6 months ago is. I couldn’t go anywhere without a car anyway, and I didn’t have a house key, so I had to stick close anyway, but at least I’ll finally “get that imprint of my ass off the couch” as Stephanie said, but then I thought about it and changed my mind.I sat back down on the couch and blankly watched XXX for who knows how long, until I realized that Stephanie was right, moping around on the couch wasn’t gonna do anyone any good, let alone me, so I might as well get up and do something. I went to the fridge and grabbed a bottle of water and killed it, knowing I’d be stepping out into a heat wave, and grabbed another bottle for the road. I put on my shoes as I debated leaving the door unlocked. I gave everybody crap for always leaving the door unlocked, but here I was about to do it, but if I didn’t I’d have to wait until someone came back to let me in, which meant I’d be stuck out in the heat until someone came home. I figured what the hell and decided to lock it, if I was hot then I’d just.
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