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On the outside that is. But it makes you appreciate what you have. I got dealt a plate full of serious. I don't fuck with life the way I used to. She's everything to me. I'm more in love with her than ever. And love does heal things, over time. I can tell you that's true. We had a conversation, lounging in bed one day, about spontaneous orgasms. Is it possible? That is, cumming with just the power of your mind? A true mind fuck. It was funny that we'd both tried when younger, before we knew each other. Lying in bed, trying to make ourselves cum without touching. Thinking of all kinds of visuals, trying to make ourselves get over the hump, trying to let go. Neither of us were successful. I got close, I remember. Felt that ache, but couldn't get further. Hell, we're all so used to using our hands now, and toys, maybe looking at porn, starting real young. Makes it easy. Maybe it's a lost art. Didn't take me long to forget about that conversation. A few weeks later we got home after. "I want you to make love to me but I don't want to rush it either. You're right about feeling something special, though. I feel it too." "Then how about I just hold you right here?" Jan nestled into my arms and allowed them to embrace her as we sat together on the sofa. "That sounds perfect." And that's how the evening went, with me holding Jan in my arms, briefly bending my head down to kiss her softly. There was no sense in taking this any further than where we were. It was enough for me, and I suspect that my standing in her heart increased several times over, simply by being there and keeping her safe next to me. Eventually Jan dozed off in my embrace. I allowed her to sleep for a short while and I spent the time just looking at her face. She seemed content, at peace with herself. A slight smile appeared and it made me smile as well. She looked happy. Eventually, I had to wake her from her nap. She apologized for falling asleep on me, but I wouldn't hear any of it. "Jan, you.
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