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Just to give myself something to do. As my body moved on it's own, my mind wandered to different places of thought. Memories of my father. Good ones, bad ones, lessons he taught me, beating into my skull the importance of always carrying a knife, reading bedtime stories (his accent always made that amazing), taking me to my martial arts classes, our fights, arguments, his disputes with mom... mom...That was the one thing I would never forgive my father for, his treatment of mom. He wasn't cruel or abusive, he just often wasn't there. He belittled her opinions, called her neurotic, at one point he even claimed that I was an accident and that he never really wanted to marry her but was pressured into it by her family. That was the last straw for her. Barely a few weeks later, they were divorced.That Bastard! The burning sensation was beginning to take hold of my gut. How dare he use me as ammunition against Mom!I continued to boil in my own rage until the sun outside had gone down. I. But now, with no reason left to be strong or brave, she released her grip on the lock and let it all out. The sobs exploded from deep in her chest and she pushed her palms into her eyelids as she bowed her head and let go. The tears fell freely into her hands and her shoulders shook as her cries rang out and bounced chaotically off each wall of the room. She whimpered noisily, her fast breaths choking their way from her throat. Every muscle tensed with pain. She hadn’t cried since the moment she’d seen Rebecca outside of Baja Fiesta that fateful prom weekend. It hadn’t been the easiest stretch since, but everything really had turned around. She’d worked her ass off in school, and while she’d fallen just a hair short, she’d at least put herself into a good position to move forward in a positive way. The tears rushed down her cheeks as she thought about what she’d done to herself. Her life had been going so well and the week had been almost perfect up until the moment she had pushed.
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