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Q. What is the difference between an epileptic oyster shucker and a prostitute with diarrhoea? A. the oyster shucker shucks between fits.Three little boys were bragging about how tough they were. “I’m so tough” said the first boy “that I can wear out a pair of shoes in a week”. “Well” said the second little boy “I’m so tough, I can wear out a pair of jeans in a day”. “That’s nothing” said the third boy. “When my parents take me to see my grandma and grandpa, I can wear them out in an hour”.My wife asked me to buy ORGANIC vegetables from the market. I went and looked around and couldn’t find any. So I grabbed an old, tired looking employee and said “These vegetables are for my wife. Have they been sprayed with any poisonous chemicals?” “The produce guy looked at me and said “No. You’ll have to do that yourself”.Dave had just returned from his honeymoon and was settling down in their new apartment. Coming home from work one night, the landlady met Dave in the hallway. She said “I have a. She leaned back in and I could feel her hot breath on my pussy. ‘What do you need little old me for?’ As she said it, her long tongue flicked my swollen clit. Another soft moan escaped me as her tongue teased me. ‘Please Julia, please, fuck me with your tongue. I need you, I need you so badly right now! Oh… please make me cum baby!’ ‘Well, since you asked so nicely I guess…’ The rest became muffled as she slid her long tongue back into me and her lips pressed against my cunt. I cried out once again as her long tongue found my most tender, intimate places. Her tongue rolled around inside me as she slid it in and out. Ecstasy flooded through me and in just a few short minutes I felt myself going over the edge. Every muscle in my body seemed to go taut and I let out a cry of pleasure as I came. I felt Julia’s hands tighten on my ass, her fingernails digging in painfully as she came with me. Ever since I had linked our minds yesterday, whenever either one of us had an orgasm, the other.
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