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” “What colour are you going to wear tonight? “She asks wearily. “Gold of course, “says the man proudly. The wife gives him a withering look and says: “What about silver? It’d be nice if you tried coming second for a change.”A sausage factory owner was showing his arrogant son around and try as he might he found it impossible to impress him. As they approached the heart of the factory, the man thought: “If this doesn’t do it nothing will!” He showed his son a machine and said: “Son, this machine is the very the heart of the factory. We put in a pig and outcomes sausages.” Still unimpressed his son merely replied: “Yes, but do you have a machine where you feed in sausages and produce a pig.” The furious father thought and said, “Yes son, we call it your mother.”A young swimmer from the Australian Olympic team sneaks his new girlfriend, a gorgeous American gymnast, into his room at the Olympic Village. Once she’s inside, he quickly switches out all the lights, they rapidly disrobe and. I grabbed a couple and carried them back to where the woman was sitting, then spread the towels over the sleeping figure in the recliner.“Thanks,” she said.“Yours?” I asked.“Yes,” she replied. “He’s had a hard week. Lots of stress, you know? He wanted to stay home, but I thought we should come. We’re neighbors, after all, and I think it’s a good idea to get to know people, don’t you?”She didn’t look familiar, so I asked, “Neighbors?”“We bought the house down the hill and just got moved in last month.”“The white two story?”“That’s it,” she answered.I thought about the house. I’d seen it advertised for sale, but I hadn’t noticed anyone move in. Sometimes I don’t pay attention to things, especially when I’m working.“Nice place. Looks big from the outside.”“It is. More than we need, but the price was in our range, so we grabbed it.”I thought about that for a bit. I noticed she didn’t have a drink.“Get you something from the snack line? Maybe a drink?”“I’m ready for a drink. What’s that.
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